From Bubble Gum to Motherhood: Navigating Self-Criticism

Hey there, fellow moms! Join me on a journey through the twists and turns of self-criticism, expectations, and the wild ride of motherhood. It all begins when we’re those tiny, adorable bundles of joy, with no worries except for our next meal. We’re like blank canvases, eagerly awaiting life’s brushstrokes to reveal our unique, determined, and individual characters.

As we grow, life throws gum in the works. You know, like when you slip on your fabulous new shoes, ready to conquer the world, only to step on a fresh wad of chewed bubble gum. Yep, that’s life’s way of saying, “Surprise!” So, there you are, stuck with bits of chewed gum in the grooves of your brand-new shoes, just like the expectations and opinions that stick to us as we journey through life. But, fear not, dear mamas, I promise I’m not just comparing us to sticky gum forever. There’s a method to my mom madness. Just like we can’t rid our shoes of every last trace of gum, life’s sticky bits start clinging to us too. Picture them as the peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth after a PB&J sandwich, refusing to budge. Yep, it’s as stubborn as that!

Now, let me connect the dots for you. We, as young, impressionable beings, start absorbing expectations from every angle, turning us into those pesky gum blobs. Sure, we can scrape off most of it, but what about those deep-seated beliefs that are as hard to remove as gum in the grooves of our shoes? They stick around, just like that stubborn piece of gum, accumulating over time. Our self-criticism evolves, and, well, the masterpiece takes a hit.

Fast forward to elementary school and junior high, and you’ve got a one-way ticket to reality and puberty. Suddenly, you’re not just dealing with gum; you’re up to your neck in bubble gum chaos. These are the years when our self-criticism really starts to rev up. The teenage years? Oh, let me tell you, they’re like the epic rollercoaster you didn’t sign up for. You know, the one where you’re holding your breath and clinging to your sense of self. Puberty hits like a ton of bricks – pimples, mood swings, and the quest for identity that has you wondering who you even are. High school doesn’t make it any easier. The pressure to fit in, be perfect, and look flawless? That’s a recipe for a massive bubble gum explosion right there.

But hey, here’s a twist in the story! After surviving the turmoil of high school, we embark on the journey of motherhood. Our bodies change as we age and have babies, and while it’s an awe-inspiring journey, it doesn’t always come without a few, shall we say, adjustments? It’s like we’re playing a never-ending game of “What’s My Body Doing Now?” Our bodies go through so many changes – stretch marks, cellulite, and that lovely little “mom pouch” that seems to have taken up permanent residence. But truthfully, they are like battle scars, worn with pride. To all you moms who manage to keep the body changes at bay with regular workouts, you have my utmost respect. I swear I have the best intentions, but somehow mom duties always seem to win the battle for my attention.

And let’s not forget the colossal impact of social media and regular entertainment on our self-expectations. Everyone seems to have their life put together, while we’re just trying to make it through the day without a complete breakdown. They make it seem like we should be chasing after our kids while looking like runway models. Well, I’m here to tell you that real-life momhood doesn’t always involve running in stilettos and flawless makeup.  Real-life motherhood is far from the picture-perfect scene you often see in glossy magazines or social media feeds. It doesn’t always involve running around in stilettos with perfectly applied makeup, ready to conquer the day. In fact, most of the time, it’s quite the opposite.

You see, the picture-perfect portrayal of mothers flawlessly gliding through life in stilettos and sporting impeccable makeup is just that—a portrayal. It’s a mirage carefully crafted for the lenses of social media and glossy magazines, far removed from the everyday chaos that engulfs the lives of most moms.

Picture this: You’re chasing after a toddler who’s decided to turn your living room into an impromptu obstacle course. Your hair is probably in a messy bun that you threw together in a hurry, and your makeup, if you even had a chance to put any on, is likely smudged from the endless hugs and kisses your little one demands. Your “fashion-forward” outfit consists of clothes that are more functional than stylish, chosen for their stain-hiding abilities and durability.

In this real-life momhood, you’ll find us in sneakers or comfy slippers, more suited for chasing after our little ones than stilettos. And that flawless makeup? Well, it often gives way to smudged mascara, courtesy of our kid’s curious fingers, or disappears entirely in the whirlwind of spilled juice, baby food, and toddler tantrums.

The truth is, no amount of makeup can conceal the exhaustion that sometimes shadows our eyes, the sleepless nights spent tending to a restless baby, or the endless to-do lists that keep growing longer. We’ve all been there, second-guessing ourselves, wondering if we’re doing this mom thing right. Are we giving our children enough love, guidance, and structure? Are we making the right decisions for our family? It’s a relentless cycle of self-doubt that even the most seasoned moms experience.

Real-life momhood often involves those days when you’re in your pajamas until noon because you’ve been up all night with a teething baby. It’s about discovering cheerios in your handbag, because, well, your little one thought it was a snack container. It’s about driving your kids to school in your comfiest yoga pants and a well-loved T-shirt, while also being the master of multitasking – refereeing sibling squabbles, answering questions about why the sky is blue, and remembering to pick up groceries on the way back.

As a mom, there’s this constant pressure to meet unrealistic expectations, to be the “supermom” who effortlessly juggles work, family, and personal life while maintaining a flawless appearance. But the truth is, we’re not superheroes in capes; we’re everyday heroes in messy buns. We make mistakes, lose our patience, and have those days when we just want to hide in the bathroom for five minutes of peace and quiet.

But here’s the secret, dear fellow moms: it’s okay to let go of those unattainable ideals and embrace the beautifully messy reality of motherhood. Real-life momhood is about those little imperfections, the stains on your shirt from a hurried breakfast, the mismatched socks, and the tangled hair—symbols of a life that’s filled with laughter, tears, and love.

The most valuable lesson we can learn is that there’s no such thing as a perfect mom, and that’s perfectly okay. Even the most seasoned moms, those who have been through the sleepless nights and the endless diaper changes, second-guess themselves. It’s a part of the gig. What truly matters is the love we pour into our families, the warmth of our hugs, the bedtime stories we share, and the countless moments of joy and connection that make this journey unique and irreplaceable. So, let’s cherish the authenticity of real-life momhood, and never let the glamorous illusions undermine our self-confidence. In sneakers or stilettos, with or without makeup, we are the incredible mothers our children need, navigating the beautiful mess of motherhood one step at a time.

So, there you have it, fellow moms. From the innocence of childhood to the chaos of motherhood, self-criticism can sneak up on us in unexpected ways. But remember, just like that piece of gum on your shoe, you’re so much more than the expectations and criticisms that stick to you. Embrace the quirks, find humor in the mess, and remember that in the end, you’re a work of art in progress, just like that blank canvas from your baby days. Keep being amazing, your journey is uniquely yours. So let’s embrace the gum and the mom pouch – they’re all part of our beautiful, messy masterpiece. Never stop laughing at life’s little surprises – gum included!

Stay strong, stay fabulous, and keep rocking those “mom shoes”!